Turn Adversity into Systems, Strength, and Self-Belief
| with guest Michael W Allison |
Michael’s core strategy is to reframe the narrative. When life feels overwhelming or self-doubt starts to spiral, he challenges us to pause and look at the situation differently.
“Self-doubt is often distorted perception. It’s not your reality. When you reframe things, you gain awareness. You begin to see what’s really going on.”
— Michael W. Allison, ADHDifference
For Michael, this reframing isn’t just a motivational idea. It is a habit, one he built through years of personal setbacks, military experience, and business leadership. Instead of asking “What’s wrong with me?” he asks, “What system am I missing?” and “How can I create structure that supports my brain?”
Why This Strategy Matters
ADHD can often amplify negative self-talk. A missed deadline becomes a personal failure. A tough day becomes proof you’re not capable. But as Michael shares, these are stories we tell ourselves. And stories can change.
Reframing gives you the power to interrupt the automatic inner critic and replace it with something more truthful and more useful. It also helps you build practical systems that reduce mental load and increase clarity.
When to Use This Strategy
Here are some moments when reframing the narrative can be especially powerful:
- When you feel overwhelmed or stuck in self-doubt: Ask yourself, “Is this a distorted perception or a real obstacle?” Then reframe the situation with curiosity, not criticism.
- When you’re facing setbacks at work or in life: Look for the systems you might need. Michael reminds us that most challenges are not about lack of ability, but lack of structure.
- When you’re trying to create change but keep slipping back: Rather than labelling yourself as lazy or inconsistent, reframe the pattern. What micro-wins can you focus on instead?
- When you’re holding yourself to unrealistic expectations: Reframing allows for self-compassion. It reminds you that progress doesn’t have to be perfect.
Supporting Tools: Systems, Micro-Wins, and Accountability
Michael’s reframing mindset is supported by three tools he uses consistently:
- Systems over goal: Systems, routines, habits, and structure are more reliable than vague goals. Systems make success repeatable.
- Micro-wins: Instead of aiming for big breakthroughs, celebrate small daily wins. These build confidence and momentum over time.
- The right people: Surround yourself with mentors, coaches, and accountability partners. These people reflect back your potential when you forget it yourself.
“When you give your brain systems to follow, it reduces the chaos and increases the clarity.”
The Science Behind It
ADHD brains are more likely to engage in negative self-evaluation, especially under stress or after setbacks. This is linked to differences in emotional regulation and executive function, particularly in the prefrontal cortex and limbic system.
Reframing the narrative works because:
- It interrupts the default mode network: This brain network is active during self-referential thinking and often fuels rumination. Reframing can shift you out of this loop and into more grounded, constructive thinking.
- It engages cognitive reappraisal: This is a core emotional regulation skill that allows us to reinterpret situations with more flexibility. Studies show this technique improves mood, motivation, and resilience.
- It supports neuroplasticity: Reframing, repeated over time, creates new neural pathways. This makes it easier to default to curiosity instead of criticism and growth instead of shame.
- It reduces all-or-nothing thinking: A common cognitive distortion in ADHD, black-and-white thinking can sabotage self-esteem. Reframing introduces nuance, which helps build emotional regulation and healthier self-talk.
In short, reframing does not just change your mindset. It changes the way your brain processes challenge, which makes long-term change more possible.
💬 Final Thought
Michael’s story is not just about surviving trauma. It’s about transforming it. His approach is a powerful reminder that ADHD does not make you broken. It simply means your brain needs structure, support, and space to shine.
By reframing the stories you tell yourself, building supportive systems, and leaning into your difference, you don’t just overcome adversity… you build a life that’s aligned with who you truly are.